I’ve envisioned writing this post for 17 months now, so please bear with me while I look around, take a few deep breaths, and shake out my limbs, starting-line style. On your marks, get set…
Robin Hood and I are having a baby!
In a lot of ways, it feels surreal. Is this actually happening? By this time next year, will there actually be a tiny human wiggling around in our home? Naaaahhhh….
It took us longer than expected to get here. For years, as my friends started having babies, then second and third babies, I heard “You’re healthy, you won’t have any trouble getting pregnant!”
It’s what we all want to believe, but it doesn’t always work that way. Our bodies, dazzling mysterious universes that they are, have their own plans. And the time table that we plot for our lives? God tends to laugh at that.
Trying unsuccessfully for over a year to get pregnant was…hard. Hopes were lifted and unceremoniously dropped every month, and it felt like my prayers were being ignored. I was scared, frustrated, and angry. I doubted.
Looking back, I realize I have a lot to be thankful for. Lots of people wait longer – in some cases, MUCH longer – before it happens for them, if it ever happens. My heart goes out to them. I have a husband who is tremendously supportive, whose love, humor, and patience with me means more to me than he’ll ever know. And while we were trying to start a family…well, shoot. We had fun. We went to Las Vegas. We went camping and hunting. We went to Disney World. We spent time with family and friends. We cried, yes, but we laughed much more.
On or around December 2, our lives will change. Really, they’re changing already, if gradually. Now, there are doctor’s appointments, mood swings, and earlier bedtimes. The bottles in our wine rack are collecting dust.
But some things (so far, anyway) have remained the same. My stomach has behaved itself. I’m still able to run. I won’t be tackling any marathons any time soon, but I can still get out there, and I signed up for a local 5k next month. I’m still able to eat plenty of delicious foods, hang out with friends, walk the dog, and (er, hooray?) pull weeds.
Who knows what will happen in the coming months? For now, I’m just thankful. Thankful for everything. And, not for the first time, I’m reminded of my “word of the year.”
There really is something to it.